Cricket, Life and God!

This started with Sachin's ad saying that "Life is like cricket" or "cricket is like life". I forget which. But anyway, it started me thinking. Life IS like cricket! You are the batsman and God is the entire opposing cricket team. God's team has the most exemplary swing bowlers, fast bowlers, leg spinners and off spinners. They can bowl both right handed and left handed, and they do so as the fancy takes them. As the umpire is also on God's payroll, he doesn't even call a no ball! And then there is the pitch to contend with! Some lucky people get absolute batting paradises, where even God cant do anything special. His leg cutters don't cut and His out swingers don't even threaten! These are the people who score runs by the centuries! But most people get horrendous pitches! The ball spits, turns, hits the throat off a length once and stays at the ankles the next. It basically makes batting a chore and a constant struggle, and most unfortunately a losing battle. Then there are a quite a few of us, who get pitches where if you work hard, you will get runs. The ball will turn, swing, bounce a little, but basically will be playable!

When we go in to start batting, the most experienced bowler of God's team is facing us. He is quite genial, even willing to let us face a few trial deliveries if we wish so. And even after that, when He starts at the back of his run up, He bowls so well that most of us cant even touch Him. He is the perfect swing bowler! Most of his deliveries land on middle and leg, and swing out! We don't even know where to put the bat! And to add to that, He keeps telling us our mistakes. "Sonny boy", he says, "You wont last long if you flash like that!". "Keep your bat close to your pads! What the hell do you think you are, the Gateway to heaven!" The first few overs are, even then, mostly play and miss, a few lucky edges and an unjudicious swipe or two, every now and then. As this is the time to consolidate your position,

The real threat is the first change bowler! Now this Bugger is really fast and furious! And your whole innings later on depends on how well you play Him! He bowls bouncers by the dozen! Ever had a paper you were sure you would fail! That's His favorite type of bouncer. It wont kill you, but dent your confidence big way. Somewhere between his barrage of bouncers and quick stuff, you suddenly realize He is not so bad, if played judiciously and properly, He can yield a few runs! All you need is to put the bat down in time and the ball races to the boundary! And you realize this is where you need to score fast and well, because if you don't, you are left playing catch for the remaining innings. Trying to score well, because you didn't score well now! Anyway, you should consider yourself lucky if you get out of His spell with only a few dents and bumps and a good score. It is somewhere around this time that you get your footwork going, your adrenaline rushing. You start seeing the ball and get the feeling that this is bloody easy, where the hell is that first outswing bowler. You have made mental plans to hoick His outswingers over midwicket and tell Him to go fetch it!

But God is an extremely shrewd captain. He realizes that you are now very comfortable playing seam and swing and introduces a new weapon. He brings out his spinners. The leg spinner spins from way out of the leg stump and the off spinner lands it just near the edge of the pitch and spins it back from there! But around this time, you are not alone. Your partner also finds her footwork and seems to be particularly adept at playing spin. She never seemed to like pace bowling in the first place. This is more her element! Of course all she does initially is take a single easily of the first ball of the over and then leave you to struggle with the spin for the rest of the over, all with a dazzling smile and a naughty batting of the eyes, like she is enjoying your discomfort! And she keeps throwing encouragement from across the pitch! You are not sure what is more irritating, that you are looking like a complete idiot or that she is not! You keep getting the feeling to strangle her, but the moment she gets near you at the end of the over, you forget your anger and just do nothing, wondering why you were so angry at her just then! She is so nice, and means so well! Eventually though, she seems to take pity on you, and takes the brunt of the attack, scoring easy singles and keeping you from getting into pressure and playing stupid shots. Soon, you find your feet against spin and take a leaf out of her book and make a glorious partnership! However, not many people find much coordination at running between the wickets and the partnership is more a comedy of errors than a smooth run getting machine! Some even get run out! Some just ask for new partners!

However, the moment you feel comfortable, an additional responsibility is sent on to you. You are given a lunch break and asked in that break to prepare a new pitch(es). You know from experience how tough it is to play on a bad pitch, so you try to make as good a pitch as you can for the new player! But making the new pitch takes time and your time depends on the amount of runs you have scored! The more runs you have scored, the longer you can keep making the pitch. Anyway, you make the best pitch(es) you can and then come back to battle!

Now, you realize, is the time for some shot playing. You have got some runs behind you and now you are seeing the ball like a football. And you realize, philosophically, by this time, that you are going to get out whatever the case! So, as well as make the most out of it, while you can! You start playing shots, get glorious runs, get some applause and finally a ball misses your bat and catches just the off bail, but that is enough! You are out! Your inning is over! You can go inside the pavilion and relax and wait for your partner to come and chat with you about the weather!